What Should I Do When I Feel Anxious?
Summer is here, and you’re thrilled to be out of the house and spending time with your family and friends. You relish the moments where you can all be together again without masks, social distancing, and other reminders of a year spent at home. What you didn’t expect, however, was that with your reclaimed freedom, you’ve also met up with your social anxiety.
You feel that unwelcome sensation arising in your chest when you’re shopping for groceries or your summer wardrobe. You feel on edge and uneasy as you carry out your daily life, doing things that should feel normal. Instead, you’re constantly aware of yourself and constantly tracking those around you with a heightened sense of awareness.
What we often get wrong about anxiety is the fact that it is an alarm system actually designed to protect us. We hate the feeling it leaves and forget that there is a purpose behind it. That said, there are things you can do to honor the protective function of anxiety and still keep it from letting it get the best of you.
Tips to prevent anxiety from going to a scary place
When that familiar feeling starts to settle in the pit of your stomach or race with the beat of your heart, rather than push it away, lean into it. Stop and center, breathe, and do something different.
Stop and Center
Using mindfulness, we can detach from the panic of the present moment, and instead become an observer of it.
To figure out what's bothering you, ask yourself: What’s happening right now? Am I safe? Is there something I need to do right now? To find the answer, pay attention to what’s going on in your body and the world around you. Notice your train of thought, the sensations in your chest, stomach, and fingers, and observe your surroundings.
Think of the sensations of anxiety as a reminder to pay attention. Your anxiety keeps you safe and helps you move through the world as a conscious and thoughtful person, rather than a robot. That said, there are times when you don’t need to be protected, and situations where logically you know that you are of little risk.
If you’re getting trapped in worry spirals, remember that your fears are “just thoughts.” Thoughts are not truths. Focus on the moment and allow these thoughts to pass you by without assigning energy to them or believing them. Bring yourself to the present moment and use your sight and hearing and touch to remind you that you are in the ‘now’ and you are a more powerful presence than your thoughts.
Breathe
One of the most helpful tools available to you in moments of anxiety is your breath. With it, we have direct access to our nervous system, and we can send a message that it’s time to slow down and re-center. Deep breathing helps you do that.
There are many different breathing techniques that can be difficult to remember in moments where the panic may be rising up, but here are three techniques that are simple enough.
Breathe Deeply - Check where you’re breathing from, whether from the shallow part of your lungs or deep within your diaphragm. Place your hand on your belly, and as you breathe, make sure you’re sending air as deep as you can.
Breathe through a straw - Purse your lips and concentrate the flow of air through them. Because of the increased difficulty involved in breathing this way, it forces your body to breathe from your diaphragm.
Count your inhales and your exhales - There are a number of different counting exercises that experts say can greatly improve your current state. However, if you are not well-versed in any of them, simply counting your inhales and exhales, and lengthening them can help to achieve the same effect. It also helps to imagine yourself breathing in the color blue and breathing out the color red, with each cycle.
Do Something Different
For moments of worry that hit while you’re at work, home, or anywhere else, here are some thoughts for what you can do to beat the lingering sense of anxiety.
Get up and walk around - Whether it’s cleaning up your work area or grabbing a drink of water from the kitchen, this can be exactly what you need to allow your mind to detach from your worries.
Check your posture - Pull your shoulders back, stand or sit with your feet apart and breathe.
Use your senses- Light up your favorite candle, or get the air-diffuser working to flood your senses with some feel-good smells. Turn on your favorite music or a podcast you’ve been meaning to listen to and get to work!
Spend time in nature - Take a break from whatever you may be working on, and spend some time outside on a walk, or just basking in the Florida sun.
Organize or clean your space - Starting this, or another project that you’ve been meaning to do but haven’t felt like you had the time can also be a welcome distraction.
Exercise or do 15 minutes of yoga - Asking your body to engage in different ways can help to beat out the sensation of anxiety lingering in your muscles and joints.
Write down your thoughts - Writing down what’s making you anxious can also help you gain some perspective and help you put words to what you are feeling. This works great to decrease insomnia!
Connect with someone else - Call or text a friend or family member and run through your worries with them. They can help you calm your fears, or at the very least, connect with someone who understands.
Connect with a therapist - While your therapist won’t be there for you 24/7, they are an incredible resource to turn to when social anxiety and other fearful thoughts don’t seem to go away.
When anxiety strikes, it’s important to have someone on your side who knows how to help, and how to lead you to a life that feels calmer and better balanced. In our work together, I can help you to recognize and adjust those thoughts that keep you up at night, so you can enjoy life as it should be.
